Last night, I was reading an essay entitled "Longing for Normalcy" from the book, "A Merry Recluse", by the late Caroline Knapp. The essay starts out with this:

"I would like to take Ordinary Joe lessons.
Can anybody out there help me?
I want to be a regular working stiff, a card-carrying member of Middle America, a nameless, faceless member of the teeming masses.
Do you know what I mean? Do you yearn for this, as well? If so, you probably understand that this is an elusive goal, more elusive than it sounds. It's about lying awake nights and wishing for a kind of simplicity that feels out of your reach most of the time. It's about longing for a humility ofspirit, a perspective that brings your expectations down to manageable levels. It's about wanting to rest, about wanting to stop striving to be the things you're not and (big sigh of relief here) just be."

She goes on to say that "This goal--the normal life, the Ordinary Joe--has eluded me. I think, because I grew up thinking that normalcy was bad, that being ordinary was an unworthy goal." and talks about how this is possibly a result of being raised in an environment that was over-advantaged and rarified. She also says, "When you're constantly striving for perfection, constantly measuring yourself against ideals, you lose access to a lot of simple feelings, a lot of humanity; you lose access to ease and joy and fun, to a sense that you're living in the present and that, for the moment at any rate, the present is good enough."

I know that an awful lot of folks have a hard time around the holidays, and I'm sorry for that. For whatever strange reason, I still have a childlike wonder, an exuberance about Christmas (and it's not like I've led a fairytale life, believe me). Some people stress out about the money or lack thereof; some about finding the "right" or "perfect" gift; some about the crowds; some about how hard it is to live up to their loved ones' expectations. I'm sorry for them, and I wish they could see things through my eyes. Of course, many of those people would believe that I'm too simple, or unrealistic, or not very intelligent, because I don't [normally] get upset or anxious or worry much. I do have stress in my life, but it's of the type that I really can't do anything about...and I'd rather not generate more for myself in the middle of this beautiful time of year or in fact at ANY time.

My wish is that each and every one of you have a sense of ease, and of joy, and of fun not just during this season of miracles, but through out the entire year.

Today I saw:

a freshly cut christmas tree on the roof of someone's car
Christmas lights
Christmas Vacation-style decorated house (I'll have to take a picture of that for y'all!)
a multicolored Christmas tree inside someone's home
a white lights Christmas tree inside someone's loft

and I smiled :-)

I certainly wouldn't call you, "too simple, or unrealistic, or not very intelligent". You enjoy life vs. getting caught up in all of the crap, which at the end of the day really doesn't mean much. I wish I could be more like that.

This was a great post!

Bravo on a wonderful post. I have a theory that simplicity brings happiness. Life is often complex enough without humanity adding to it. Therefore the simple things in life are what matter most.

Absolutely fabulous post! Well done!!! :) I'm with you - I love Christmas!

Lovely post, Janet. I learned Christmas from my mother, who, in the words of Dickens, knows how to keep it well.

Michele sent me today.

This was a truly great post.
I have found that being ordinary is possible when you stop trying to be ordinary. Being at ease, enjoying life, and not dwelling on what you don't have, instead smiling and appreciating what you do.
(This apparently is something that Paris Hilton will never learn! LOL)

All I want for Christmas this year IS ...a perspective that brings your [my] expectations down to manageable levels."

Amazing post. I am working toward the goal of not worrying about the material side of Christmas this year. Already I feel less stressed.

I am 47.. an I still wonder at Christmastime. I find it magical and new every year - I love it!

Wonderful post, Janet. Just last night, I was talking with my sister about simplifying the holidays, amd enjoying the wonder of the season, rather than getting stressed out, as our mother does, about creating a "perfect" day.

I'm here from Michele's.

You're right; Christmas can be stressful for so many. It started getting easier for me when I pulled back and quit worrying about making it "perfect" and instead focused on making it about family. Our one enduring tradition is to buy at least two new ornaments per year; one for Sweet Girl (this will be the 6 ornament) and one that has something to do with our lives in the last year.

Oh, and Michele sent me.

Wonderful post Janet! I'm going to take your lead, and do my best to spend part of this time enjoying the pleasures of this Holiday Season. Thanks for stopping by my place too. :-)

3T

Keep smiling and happy holidays. :)

My father made the holidays wonderful for me as a child and I brought my daughter up with the same sense of wonder and fun. To add to the fun, it's the only time of year we all get together, which makes it even more special!

What a gorgeous post. So necessary. I went low-key this year. I decided I didn't have to fill my dance card with toxic people, or live like I'm being interviewed at a high school reunion. I just want to spend time with my 3 favorite people at home, doing what we want to do.

Thanks for this :)

Really? I never really wanted to be normal. I often wanted to "feel" normal but not be normal. I used to have a bumper sticker that said "why be normal?" and I hung it upside down.

The Christmas lights are up in Floyd!